16.17 Kadinsky

Feels like I, with hope to reach some sort of a goal, wander around in a city I hardly know. May feel like that because thats what I do. But I know the town fairly well. Maybe we're not the best of friends, and it does not always take me where I wish to go (there might be other things to hold responsible for that though). We are in the beginning of a relationship that, I think will prove to be stormy but quit fucking fruitful. I can stand on the balcony in this flat city, in this flat country, and almost see beyond the horizon. Theres not a single mountain. Not even a small hill. Can make me feel like I'm a friend of the city. The backyard that the balcony face gives the impression that your in a small, pour, east European town. In some way. Peoples messy backyards are protected from the city outside by the courtyard. The sweep the crap under the carpet. The fact that everyone that have a window faced toward the courtyard have to look at all this shit dose not matter 'cause the people with yard-faced windows are the people making the mess. There is a playground too, swings and shit. A ping-pong table even and a slide. Everything protected by houses. Pretty tumbledown houses. I like this town. I like the crooked, sinking houses in this town on mud.

That the city not always takes me where I want to go, is not necessary something negative. I can find myself drinking coffee and playing cards in some cosy joint with a good friend. Thats not fucking bad.